Many wonders: “why I attract exactly those people who are not suitable for me?” The answer is actually very simple: because your wounded self is the one that draws. Now, maybe “I hurt” sounds a little drama but … There are two sides in us: “small selves” (or wounded self, ego) and the “spiritual” Self (tall adult self, or soul). I hurt is the part of you that feels incomplete. Do you doubt the value; not feeling the whole, or feels as flawed in one way or another. My hurt self is “my little self” which are asking if they can, indeed, beloved/a. on the other hand, there are Spiritual Selves. It is higher, the soul self. It’s part of you that you get in touch with love, truth, wisdom, and peace inside you. Your Spiritual self-knows, without a doubt, you deserve to be loved/a. In many ways, it is just the opposite of the ego.
At any time, we act with one of these egos. Many of us act, unfortunately, most of the times, with ego. I feel like we’re insignificant and powerless in a certain way and we try to overcome these shortcomings. Ego in us looks for things outside to confirm and supplement. I think if more (more money, a better partner, a better job, a better House, more holidays, etc. ..) will finally be happy. But … There’s never happy. Not for long, anyway. Because it’s in the nature of the ego to feel incomplete. That’s why, when you live by the ego’s perspective, you’re meant to feel like something is missing. Life watched from this perspective is not too pleasant. The ego becomes very active when it comes to relationships because the relationship is developing the biggest wounds. We all felt hurt or disappointed by any past relationship; We keep the memory of this injury in adult life (sometimes without being aware of it). If a wound from childhood remains alive inside you, you will attract people who express the same sentiment. For example, if the wound is concentrated around the feeling of rejection or lack of attention, the same feelings you have in your relationships as an adult. The subconscious is programmed to attract people that you activate the wounds. The reason is so that you can progress. This is the frustrating process of growth! But think about it this way: relive certain wounds, finally to heal them. We can’t cure something you do not see; We can’t cure something that remains at the subconscious level! Uncomfortable feelings must go out to the surface so you can skip over them and to develop yourself further.
And how do you develop next?
Identify with your higher self. Don’t forget, your higher self is that part of you that knows the truth about yourself. Know that you are valuable, amazing, able and strong. Through your higher self, you’re whole. Yes, you are a person with flaws, imperfect but the truth is vast than that: you’re a soul. You’re beautiful. You’re important. You’re special. You are pure romance. Becoming one with your higher self (and with love from you) will drop the tendency to relive wounds in relation with others, or will disappear altogether. When you wake up and you identify with your higher self you realize that people are “unequal” were not the only people designed to help you to learn some lessons of life; lessons of life that you don’t put in doubt the value. Unfortunately, nothing helps us to grow more than a wounded heart. Accept the love in you and you will heal your relationships from within.